Support For Men Facing (or have faced) Divorce

[Keith Martin]

Amen, @steve. What comes across loud and clear with the majority of women I've interacted with on dating sites is that they simply assume they're coming into the 'negotiations' with the upper hand, because most of them start out with their list of demands that have as the unspoken other side of the coin being that, as men, we're so desperate for pussy we can't help but bargain for it. I can almost always figuratively hear the air being released from their tires when they learn that I'm in the opposite of a hurry and won't even consider sexual intercourse until after solid commitments are in place (you will remember my Palatka pal).

I especially like that last part about being free to court others during the same time period.

 

[cnystrom]

She is a very dear friend of ours from church. I really like her and she seems to really like me. She and my wife love each other very much. I could really see her fitting well into my family as my second wife.

It's an extreme longshot as:
1. My wife really doesn't like the idea of polygyny (though she seems to know that the Bible permits it).

I really don't want to be one of those men facing divorce.

2. This young woman likely has no idea that the Bible permits polygyny (like most Christians).
3. The church we all attend would certainly disfellowship us all were we to pursue that. I'm willing to lose our local church to gain a good wife, but my wife and this young woman might find that more difficult.

Is your wife clear on Biblical teaching on divorce? It might end up being a real test of her faith and who she serves. It might be a good time to check on her understanding of divorce before it becomes an issue.

#2 is a tough situation. If #1 was different it might be easier, as in your wife could maybe break the ice, but as it is it would be tough. If your wife goes to BF retreats and sees other families or interacts with the polygamy community she might change her mind over time. It is hard to say.

#3. Would be a good bargain if you can get it, but it is hard to get there, where it is you three (or more) against the world. Having said that I think fellowship is more important to wives happiness than it is to husbands and a wise husbands would look for ways to help their wives interact and spend more time with other women, whether BF retreats, women's chat, or other local events where you can still participate and fellowship.

Anyway, best wishes. Longshots always make life interesting.