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Wedding Ceremony Plans
- Thread starter Holly
- Start date
This is the idea we had. We were not able to do it because of unforseen circumstances but would still like to make it happen someday. It was to take place at a retreat (surrounded by other believers so that the celebration is indeed, a celebration.)
Hubby and first wife renew their vows
Hubby and second wife say vows to each other
The three make pledges to each other
Then every one celebrates.
We did a watered down version for our ceremony because wife #1 was not able to join us. However, we had a wedding cake. We created a marriage ceremony that was read by another man in the group. A friend stood with me as we pledged our love and support to each other and our family. We included wife #1 via cell phone and hubby and I made a committment to her that way. She said she was touched by being included even though she was so far away.
We didn't have an officiant because we looked through the bible and bible history and could not find any reference to a "pastor" or "rabbi" being an officiant. So we had our marriage certificate read in the presence of witnesses. We had 4 witnesses sign the document and we signed it. We made a very pretty certificate that is suitable for framing and hanging.
Hubby and first wife renew their vows
Hubby and second wife say vows to each other
The three make pledges to each other
Then every one celebrates.
We did a watered down version for our ceremony because wife #1 was not able to join us. However, we had a wedding cake. We created a marriage ceremony that was read by another man in the group. A friend stood with me as we pledged our love and support to each other and our family. We included wife #1 via cell phone and hubby and I made a committment to her that way. She said she was touched by being included even though she was so far away.
We didn't have an officiant because we looked through the bible and bible history and could not find any reference to a "pastor" or "rabbi" being an officiant. So we had our marriage certificate read in the presence of witnesses. We had 4 witnesses sign the document and we signed it. We made a very pretty certificate that is suitable for framing and hanging.
Nikismom
Member
Lissa thank you for sharing that!!!
We too have been wondering what and how we wanted to do a ceremony. I'd love to have some ideas on the ceremony, my soon to be SW wants me to be fully involved in their ceremony since she and I are so close. I want hubby and SW to have some private time when she gets here.... they have done most of their courting in long distance relationship.... so I am going to take the baby with me to a friends house for a few days and allow them some alone time.
I would like to surprise her with a lovely ceremony and would love input from other sister wives here!
Thanks Holly for asking this question!!!
We too have been wondering what and how we wanted to do a ceremony. I'd love to have some ideas on the ceremony, my soon to be SW wants me to be fully involved in their ceremony since she and I are so close. I want hubby and SW to have some private time when she gets here.... they have done most of their courting in long distance relationship.... so I am going to take the baby with me to a friends house for a few days and allow them some alone time.
I would like to surprise her with a lovely ceremony and would love input from other sister wives here!
Thanks Holly for asking this question!!!
libertarianwhacko
New Member
This is all so beautiful I want to cry.
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Anonymous
Guest
Lulu84 said:
I don't think it's selfish at all ! I totally understand. I want to have my own "special day" myself. I think it depends alot on the individuals and how close they are....but I agree with you.
Blessings,
Fairlight
I have always felt that whatever my sisterwife/BFF would want in her ceremony should be what we do. I had always dreamed of getting married in Las Vegas, and I got to have my dream wedding, so feel like it would be only fair she would get to have whatever she was wanting as well. Just my two cents.
Kacy
Kacy
But what if your bff didn't get her dream wedding? That is why we were going to combine it so that we could both have elements of our dream in it. And I thought something really cool would be to stand up for each other. A few days before the ceremonies we would go get facials and get our hair done and our nails done, all the things that you usually do with your maid of honor. We would pamper each other.
Now, if it were the first wedding for all involved, then the "wedding night" would be an issue and I would suggest that each woman have their own special time. Ours was all going to be ceremonial, because we have both been "married" to him for a while. This was to be our public ceremony. We would each have kept our original anniversary.
Now, if it were the first wedding for all involved, then the "wedding night" would be an issue and I would suggest that each woman have their own special time. Ours was all going to be ceremonial, because we have both been "married" to him for a while. This was to be our public ceremony. We would each have kept our original anniversary.
A
Anonymous
Guest
"Dream wedding" is such an ambiguious term, could we have some idea of what that means in size or cost? How important is it anyway? Not saying, just asking.
withfresheyes
New Member
I personally do not give much thought to a ceremony. Why is it necessary or is it even necessary? To put so much planning and whatever expense one deemed necessary, and for what? To simply become his wife would be all the celebration I would need. Nothing fancy nor expensive. To be honest, I would request of him a quiet conversation allowing one another to state their views, but in the end I would follow his advise and his lead. I'm a simpleton. Now, may I ask "Am I off my rocker here? I already know I am the oddball out! Would the lady be in a somewhat rebellious attitude if she insisted on a special ceremony with guests and all the trimmings, which she has a right too? If he objected would this not cause friction? I personally would desire to please him, therefore is he even gave the slightest hint that he would rather not have a special ceremony, then I am there by his side in total agreement.
Faithful Servant
Member
Greetings & Blessings!
What a wonderful topic, as we discuss the joy of new found love and the lovely addition of a new wife/family member! Praise & follow Yashua, and your dh as they both lead in this area. The adding of a sw/new found love, respect, concern, help & Godly wisdom to any family is a time of joyous/Godly celebration. I would assume that each individual family that has been called to pm, has their own personal ideas/convictions as to what is important & meaningful to them as a new marriage/partnership and family is united and developed. What is important to one couple/family, may not be to another. However with all the planning of such a joyous & blessed event, or the simple plans of such a special event unfold & take place it is up to that family how to proceed forward, especially as so long as it's approached in a Godly manner. Through prayer and conversation with all involved or just discussed between the couple, is their concern & business alone.
Of course as "Biblical/Submissive Helpmeets to our dh's," we would be wise to follow their lead and wishes in all matters of marriage/life. I don't believe that the original post has suggested otherwise, or has encouraged or promoted the wife taking over of all planning of said celebration and focusing only on the "materialistic aspect of the celebration either." It seems as though that all involved in this family has gladly with dh's permission, sought out the advice or suggestions from their brothers & sister's in Christ here. Thank you for sharing in your families new addition and upcoming celebration. May you continue on the path that Yashua has you all on. Following Yashua and your dh's lead in all matters of life, as you all seek His will first & foremost. Finding His Wisdom, Provisions, Protection and Joy for the journey!
FOR HIS GLORY ALONE,
BE BLESSED & UNITED IN YASHUA!
F.S.
What a wonderful topic, as we discuss the joy of new found love and the lovely addition of a new wife/family member! Praise & follow Yashua, and your dh as they both lead in this area. The adding of a sw/new found love, respect, concern, help & Godly wisdom to any family is a time of joyous/Godly celebration. I would assume that each individual family that has been called to pm, has their own personal ideas/convictions as to what is important & meaningful to them as a new marriage/partnership and family is united and developed. What is important to one couple/family, may not be to another. However with all the planning of such a joyous & blessed event, or the simple plans of such a special event unfold & take place it is up to that family how to proceed forward, especially as so long as it's approached in a Godly manner. Through prayer and conversation with all involved or just discussed between the couple, is their concern & business alone.
Of course as "Biblical/Submissive Helpmeets to our dh's," we would be wise to follow their lead and wishes in all matters of marriage/life. I don't believe that the original post has suggested otherwise, or has encouraged or promoted the wife taking over of all planning of said celebration and focusing only on the "materialistic aspect of the celebration either." It seems as though that all involved in this family has gladly with dh's permission, sought out the advice or suggestions from their brothers & sister's in Christ here. Thank you for sharing in your families new addition and upcoming celebration. May you continue on the path that Yashua has you all on. Following Yashua and your dh's lead in all matters of life, as you all seek His will first & foremost. Finding His Wisdom, Provisions, Protection and Joy for the journey!
FOR HIS GLORY ALONE,
BE BLESSED & UNITED IN YASHUA!
F.S.
I believe that this is a personal choice that every family will make according to their needs and desires. I totally understand when you say that a wife should follow the lead of her husband. But I also believe that a family will care about the desires of the wive's hearts. How would it be if a woman were to join with a family who had no desire to fulfill her desires. God is relational and husbands and wives satisfy needs in each other that go beyond sexual needs. They fill social and security needs as well.
For me, the purpose of the ceremony was to celebrate my new life. The idea of being a second wife involves so much secrecy, that it almost feels like it is shameful. I wanted to celebrate with people who love me and who don't consider this to be something to be ashamed of. We didn't spend a lot of money. I think my dress was $40 and the cake was $20. We didn't get flowers and we didn't spend much on anything else.
When a man marries his first wife, the whole world celebrates. They have all the trimmings and they shout it out to the world. If marrying a second wife is not a sin (and this we agree on) then why shouldn't she have a celebration. Why shouldn't the family share their joy with loved ones and create lasting memories?
When a second wife has children, someday they are going to ask about their parents' wedding. I think that a child would wonder why there are wedding pictures and memories of the first wife's wedding but not of the second's.
Ceremonies happen throughout the Bible. Look at the Israelites in the Old Testament. They were forever building alters and pillars to commemorate some battle that was won or some milestone. Well, if people are getting married (which is a thing that God is intricately involved in) then there is no Godly reason not to celebrate it with whatever ceremony you want.
For me, the purpose of the ceremony was to celebrate my new life. The idea of being a second wife involves so much secrecy, that it almost feels like it is shameful. I wanted to celebrate with people who love me and who don't consider this to be something to be ashamed of. We didn't spend a lot of money. I think my dress was $40 and the cake was $20. We didn't get flowers and we didn't spend much on anything else.
When a man marries his first wife, the whole world celebrates. They have all the trimmings and they shout it out to the world. If marrying a second wife is not a sin (and this we agree on) then why shouldn't she have a celebration. Why shouldn't the family share their joy with loved ones and create lasting memories?
When a second wife has children, someday they are going to ask about their parents' wedding. I think that a child would wonder why there are wedding pictures and memories of the first wife's wedding but not of the second's.
Ceremonies happen throughout the Bible. Look at the Israelites in the Old Testament. They were forever building alters and pillars to commemorate some battle that was won or some milestone. Well, if people are getting married (which is a thing that God is intricately involved in) then there is no Godly reason not to celebrate it with whatever ceremony you want.
A
Anonymous
Guest
Well said, Lissa ! I agree 
Blessings,
Fairlight
Blessings,
Fairlight
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Anonymous
Guest
John Whitten said:
Hi John
I don't think there is any one definition to this. I think it really depends on the individuals involved and how they define it for themselves. Some women want a big lavish wedding and others may want something small and intimate. I don't think it's always necessary to spend alot of money in order to have a meaningful celebration.
Blessings,
Fairlight
Faithful Servant
Member
Amen Sweetlissa & fairlight,
I couldn't have said it better myself! My thoughts exactly as far as making sure the second or any additional wives joining a family, are able to have their "Special day," and time of celebration as the first wife had. Maybe not the same of course, but whatever is special to the dh and new wife. Some believe that b/c any wife has an opinion or thought or wish of her own, that she is somehow not "obeying or honoring her dh in all things." Just wanted to clarify that a wife can present her wishes, dreams, hopes and any requests to her dh, doing so in a Godly manner of course, thus remaining " a Christ honoring-obedient helpmmeet." Not promoting whining, badgering or demanding one's own way. Just encouraging Godly/wholesome, compassionate & honest communication between all married partners. Marriage isn't an army without peoples feelings being considered, prayed and talked about. It's a Family of individual relationships united in Christ. Just as we're encouraged and blessed to have the ability to approach our Abba Father, we should all have the ability to approach one another and speak the Truth in Godly Love. Which would encompass the discussions of planning a joyous celebration of new family member!
FOR GODS GLORY ALONE,
F.S.
I couldn't have said it better myself!
My thoughts exactly as far as making sure the second or any additional wives joining a family, are able to have their "Special day," and time of celebration as the first wife had. Maybe not the same of course, but whatever is special to the dh and new wife. Some believe that b/c any wife has an opinion or thought or wish of her own, that she is somehow not "obeying or honoring her dh in all things." Just wanted to clarify that a wife can present her wishes, dreams, hopes and any requests to her dh, doing so in a Godly manner of course, thus remaining " a Christ honoring-obedient helpmmeet." Not promoting whining, badgering or demanding one's own way. Just encouraging Godly/wholesome, compassionate & honest communication between all married partners. Marriage isn't an army without peoples feelings being considered, prayed and talked about. It's a Family of individual relationships united in Christ. Just as we're encouraged and blessed to have the ability to approach our Abba Father, we should all have the ability to approach one another and speak the Truth in Godly Love. Which would encompass the discussions of planning a joyous celebration of new family member! FOR GODS GLORY ALONE,
F.S.