Should I prevent the second marriage for the sake of other's conscience?

[MichaelZ]

Corinthian 10:
28 But if someone says to you, “This has been offered in sacrifice,” then do not eat it, for the sake of the one who informed you, and for the sake of conscience— 29 I do not mean your conscience, but his. For why should my liberty be determined by someone else's conscience? 30 If I partake with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of that for which I give thanks?

31 So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. 32 Give no offense to Jews or to Greeks or to the church of God, 33 just as I try to please everyone in everything I do, not seeking my own advantage, but that of many, that they may be saved.
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So my question is: should I consider other's conscience for my second marriage? What Paul's teaching including things like marriage or just eat and drink? (He said 'or whatever you do')

 

[andrew]

Whose conscience are you considering? Your first wife's? Friends and family? The leadership of your local church?...

 

[Verifyveritas76]

To me it all comes down to chain of command. The wife's role is an advisory/helpmeet/executive assistant type role. If the advisor gets offended because the executor executes a directive from someone higher in the chain of command, the problem lies within her misunderstanding of her role and how important her advice is.

If both of you are dedicated followers of Christ, and the leader of your "team" gets instructions from the boss, how can you not obey just because someone on the team gets their feel goods in a knot? Would this not indicate an issue with them and the boss?

 

[andrew]

Activate multi-like button....

 

[Mojo]

To me it all comes down to chain of command. The wife's role is an advisory/helpmeet/executive assistant type role. If the advisor gets offended because the executor executes a directive from someone higher in the chain of command, the problem lies within her misunderstanding of her role and how important her advice is.

If both of you are dedicated followers of Christ, and the leader of your "team" gets instructions from the boss, how can you not obey just because someone on the team gets their feel goods in a knot? Would this not indicate an issue with them and the boss?

Nice.

 

[Jim an Apostle]

I often bring up the discussion of the fact that Paul circumcised Timothy but not Titus. Why? the difference was control/ authority. the choice was Paul's not the Jewish leaders who would have brought him under their authority (in the case of Titus) and in the case of Timothy Paul made the choice not them in order to reach them not in order to satisfy their the Jews conscience. We must act in obedience to the Holy Spirit not just to please men. The world thinks it knows more about being a Christian than a Christian does. We must not allow them to define our walk.

 

[FollowingHim]

Paul here is speaking about actions in front of others in public. We should still live as we believe is right - but may modify our behaviour in public to avoid causing offence.

To apply this to marriage, if we believe God is telling us to take two wives, we should do so. However we should not make a show of this in front of others who would find it offensive.

It is ok to have two wives.
It's not ok to turn up to the local staunchly monogamous church arm-in-arm, wearing a t-shirt saying "Though I've got two, there's still room for you", kiss both wives in front of the congregation then start chatting up one of the choir ladies.
But it would be ok to quietly walk in, sit in the pews without any overtly affectionate behaviour, and just worship with everyone like a man with a couple of female friends/relations, drawing no attention to yourselves to avoid offence.

 

[notforevil]

But it would be ok to quietly walk in, sit in the pews without any overtly affectionate behaviour, and just worship with everyone like a man with a couple of female friends/relations, drawing no attention to yourselves to avoid offence.

The key to living in a non-poly world!!!! Great Wisdom Brother

 

[MichaelZ]

Paul here is speaking about actions in front of others in public. We should still live as we believe is right - but may modify our behaviour in public to avoid causing offence.

To apply this to marriage, if we believe God is telling us to take two wives, we should do so. However we should not make a show of this in front of others who would find it offensive.

It is ok to have two wives.
It's not ok to turn up to the local staunchly monogamous church arm-in-arm, wearing a t-shirt saying "Though I've got two, there's still room for you", kiss both wives in front of the congregation then start chatting up one of the choir ladies.
But it would be ok to quietly walk in, sit in the pews without any overtly affectionate behaviour, and just worship with everyone like a man with a couple of female friends/relations, drawing no attention to yourselves to avoid offence.

Good point! Any suggestion if I'm one of the church elders. It's not easy to act secretly.

 

[FollowingHim]

If you're an elder, it's going to come out sooner or later. Best to just be up-front with the other elders and deal with the fallout prior to the wedding, so you've got one less stress to deal with afterwards. But to directly apply the scripture:

What is God telling you to do?

If you just want another wife for your own personal gratification and have no leading from God on the matter, then not causing offence may well be one of the many legitimate considerations you should take account of when deciding whether to marry or not. If God has put you in a job for the Kingdom that would be made more difficult if you had another wife, then you may be right to stay monogamous. His work comes first, and we may have to make many personal sacrifices to keep our focus on that.

But if God is clearly saying "marry that woman", obey Him regardless of how others will think. We must obey God rather than man.

 

[Mojo]

Paul here is speaking about actions in front of others in public. We should still live as we believe is right - but may modify our behaviour in public to avoid causing offence.

To apply this to marriage, if we believe God is telling us to take two wives, we should do so. However we should not make a show of this in front of others who would find it offensive.

It is ok to have two wives.
It's not ok to turn up to the local staunchly monogamous church arm-in-arm, wearing a t-shirt saying "Though I've got two, there's still room for you", kiss both wives in front of the congregation then start chatting up one of the choir ladies.
But it would be ok to quietly walk in, sit in the pews without any overtly affectionate behaviour, and just worship with everyone like a man with a couple of female friends/relations, drawing no attention to yourselves to avoid offence.

Bingo!

 

[notforevil]

Any suggestion if I'm one of the church elders

What does the scriptures that state, an elder must be the “husband of one wife”, mean?
English translations leave vague gray areas as to the fullness of Titus 1:6 & 1 Timothy 3:2 ...

Anybody with depth of the original writings and language willing to help our brother here?

*** mias gunaikos andra / One Woman Man *** (but the context is critical)

 

[IshChayil]

To me it all comes down to chain of command. The wife's role is an advisory/helpmeet/executive assistant type role. If the advisor gets offended because the executor executes a directive from someone higher in the chain of command, the problem lies within her misunderstanding of her role and how important her advice is.

If both of you are dedicated followers of Christ, and the leader of your "team" gets instructions from the boss, how can you not obey just because someone on the team gets their feel goods in a knot? Would this not indicate an issue with them and the boss?

C.C.