One member is often heard to say (in person, he doesn't post much) that ...
Women are, by nature reflectors. They reflect, with a feminine twist, what the men in their lives have shined into them. As a marriage progresses, that will become more and more what her husband is currently shining into her life. Less and less can be blamed upon the men of her past. (Sorta like a certain American president who still wants to blame his problems on a past president 5 years into his own presidency...)
So if a man is finding that what he is experiencing from his wife is anger, rebellion, insecurity, selfishness, etc., his first step oughta be to sit back and look within himself to see what, when, how, and where he has shone those things into her.
I'm not quite sure yet how this applies when the woman is not speaking her own mind but is allowing her voice to be used, perhaps without realizing it, by an opposing spirit (demon), but I'm sure that there IS an answer. Perhaps he has done the same towards God?
Friends outside BF, who are Family Psychologists (a husband - wife team) say it like this:
Men are initiators, women are responders. That's the way God made us.
They also say that, in the nature of marriage relationships,
The rocks in one person's head ALWAYS fit the holes in the other's. If you want to improve the health of your marriage, improve your own mental / spiritual health. This will make your 'other' very uncomfortable. SO uncomfortable, in fact, that they will either begin to change / improve as well, or will exit the relationship.
Can anyone add to, improve upon, or correct this beyond a knee-jerk "I don't want it to be so, so it isn't"? I admit, I don't find the concept particularly comfortable myself. It is forcing me into further soul-searching over the failures in my own past relationships. But that doesn't mean it isn't TRUE! *sigh*
(Sir BumbleBerry is hiding under the park bench and whimpering, "Don't look at ME! It's not MY fault!"
:roll: :lol: )
Women are, by nature reflectors. They reflect, with a feminine twist, what the men in their lives have shined into them. As a marriage progresses, that will become more and more what her husband is currently shining into her life. Less and less can be blamed upon the men of her past. (Sorta like a certain American president who still wants to blame his problems on a past president 5 years into his own presidency...)
So if a man is finding that what he is experiencing from his wife is anger, rebellion, insecurity, selfishness, etc., his first step oughta be to sit back and look within himself to see what, when, how, and where he has shone those things into her.
I'm not quite sure yet how this applies when the woman is not speaking her own mind but is allowing her voice to be used, perhaps without realizing it, by an opposing spirit (demon), but I'm sure that there IS an answer. Perhaps he has done the same towards God?
Friends outside BF, who are Family Psychologists (a husband - wife team) say it like this:
Men are initiators, women are responders. That's the way God made us.
They also say that, in the nature of marriage relationships,
The rocks in one person's head ALWAYS fit the holes in the other's. If you want to improve the health of your marriage, improve your own mental / spiritual health. This will make your 'other' very uncomfortable. SO uncomfortable, in fact, that they will either begin to change / improve as well, or will exit the relationship.
Can anyone add to, improve upon, or correct this beyond a knee-jerk "I don't want it to be so, so it isn't"? I admit, I don't find the concept particularly comfortable myself. It is forcing me into further soul-searching over the failures in my own past relationships. But that doesn't mean it isn't TRUE! *sigh*
(Sir BumbleBerry is hiding under the park bench and whimpering, "Don't look at ME! It's not MY fault!"
:roll: :lol: )
