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Name change for second wife?

S

seekHim1

Member
Sorry if this is somewhere else on the board. SW and I don't remember seeing it anywhere.

Has anyone (specifically a second wife) had her name legally changed to the husband's last name despite the fact that you cannot be legally married if the husband is already legally married to first wife? If so or if you've researched it, are there certain issues that could arise in doing this? I know that celebrities often legally change their names, so what stops anyone from changing his/her name to whatever he/she wants at any time? Or does doing a name change while living PM possibly draw more attention to your family which could result in legal issues?

Any thoughts or input appreciated. Thanks!
 
Anyone can do a name change at any time. (Well, minors would require parental permission ...) It isn't terribly complicated, difficult, or expensive.

In '97, my (then) wife and kids and I changed our last name to Woods due to problems with my dad. I later changed back to Wiedemann (not wanting any fruit of bitterness in my life).

First, I called an attorney. He quoted us $300 per person. X 6 people, that had me gulping. So I went to the county courthouse and talked with the clerk. She whipped out a checklist sheet that explained the process, what papers had to be filed when, what court appearances were needed, etc. She also told me how to find a sample to adapt for ourselves, and told me that we could put ALL 6 of us on one document.

It was pretty easy to adapt the documents needed on the word processor. By putting us all on one document, we only had to pay one fee, $50 if memory serves. I had to make 2 or 3 trips to file the appropriate documents at the right times, and we all had to show up for a court hearing which consisted of the judge peering at us over his glasses and saying, "Y'all sure you wanna do this?" "Yup." "Ok, so ordered." Rather anticlimactic.

A few weeks later, they sent us the official signed and sealed final document ordering the name change. With that, we changed Driver's licenses, Social Security cards, Passports, Bank Accts (The banks put an "aka Cecil Woods" on the acct, so both names would work), and life settled back into relative boredom. :)

I think that it is a worthwhile thing to do from a family unity point of view, and can't think that there would be any negative legal ramifications. Who cares, except yourselves, what your name is -- so long as it is legal?
 
Cecil, thanks so much for your response. We appreciate your input very much! And as always, I appreciate your lighthearted way of sharing. Your posts often make me chuckle! :)
 
About 12 or so years ago, hubby, wife1 and all the kids, spouses and grandkids changed their names because hubby wanted to honor his natural father whom he had located in his adult years. It was not hard. I intend to change my name sometime. Just haven't gotten around to it yet.

SweetLissa
 
welltan said:
But I do not see much advantage for it.
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It's not about advantage, it's about the second wife feeling more apart of the family rather than feeling like an outsider due to having a different last name. Various things have been important to hubby for this reason b/c he sympathizes with different areas of sensitivity for SW...like the rest of us having hubby's last name except her.
 
It's not about advantage, it's about the second wife feeling more apart of the family rather than feeling like an outsider
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Amen.
 
I, personally, have always thought it is a good idea, regardless of the legality of it. It draws both women in to the covering and authority of the man. Maybe it's just symbolic, but biblically any wife would have "wife of____" after her name. You are being called by your husband's name and so should his other wife.

On the other hand, I do have a friend that is a second wife who kept her maiden name and her children have the husband's last name. Her last name is special to her because of the country that her family came from and it's a piece of her heritage that she holds on to. Whatever works for that individual and family as a whole.

BTW, I miss you and your SW!!!!! Hugs to you both!
 
sweetlissa said:
About 12 or so years ago, hubby, wife1 and all the kids, spouses and grandkids changed their names because hubby wanted to honor his natural father whom he had located in his adult years.
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I did the same thing ! I found my natural father when I was 16 yrs. old. I changed my surname to his not long after that.

I would definitely want my husband's surname when I get married. :)
Blessings,
Fairlight
 
Here in England, changing your name can be done online--much more convenient.

By the way, not all cultures use Surnames. No-one in the early church would have used a surname, as patronymics were the rule amoung both jews and gentiles. Jesus would have been "Jeshua ben Joseph" (Jesus son of Joseph) The only equivalent of a surname was the name of your clan, but this was only used in reference to the family/ clan as a whole, it didn't belong to you personally. The only exception that know of, were the Romans, who for some unknown reason did not use patronymics (an old Indo-European custom which they abandoned fairly early in their history) Amoung the Romans, the clan name became a surname. Sometimes an extra name was added to distinguish one branch of the family from another. Thus Marcus Tullius Cicero--Marcus, of the Tullius branch of the Cicero family. Our present custom of using surnames arose in the Rennaissance period, when the ancient world was being rediscovered, and many people were being inspired by what they discovered there.

As for other cultures, moslems I know, tell me that in their culture, your family name designates your biological birth family, and so is never changed when marrying. A married woman still carries her original family name. Which sounds logical.

Hope this is of interest.

---Ryenwine
 
In Scriptural times, when a woman married, there were restrictions to whom she could marry because when she married, she would cease being from her family and become a full fledged member of her husband's family. She no longer would have her old families designation, but would in fact carry her husband's family. When we come to the Messiah spiritually, our last name ceases to reference the physical, but we take on His name as His bride. It would be interesting to see how someone would not want to take on His name when they marry Him, or even to put a hyphen in that name, trying to hold on to the old in some way, form, or fashion.

Shabbat Shalom,
Scott
 
Hello all. Just wanted to let you know SW did get her last name legally changed and it went through last week. You can either pay a lawyer a ridiculous amount of money to do it, or do the legwork yourself (which is what she and hubby did). It took filling out paperwork, paying to get fingerprints for a background check, a fee for the background check and 3 trips to the county courthouse. During the last trip to the courthouse, she appeared before a judge to verify she was not changing her name to avoid creditors and it was official.

Scott - everything you said is how hubby views it. It was very important for him regarding SW to be out with the old, in with the new, so to speak. Like you said, it could be holding on to the old and even one's relatives when your immediate family is your real family. All having the same last name solidifies SW's ties with us - her new family.
 
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