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My single plight awareness

Nicoleplusluv

New Member
Real Person
Female
It's not as easy as it would seem for a single woman to find a family to join. I know what I want in my heart of hearts and that is to have children in a Godly home, with a righteous man, leading a strong pack of momma wolves, who are just as dedicated to building a relationship with God and raising children who understand that we are the stewards of this precious life and everything in it. Being interconnected to this husband and wives feels so important to me at times... (is it an obsession?)

The more I look for this life, the more I see that I'm not alone in the long search. How much easier it would be for me to just join a monogamous relationship... (it's just as hard to find) I've worked so much on self healing after a long abusive marriage and I feel that pushed me over the hump of self pity about not finding a family quickly enough... (what a crybaby I can be about it sometimes)

So I give it all to you God, I'm letting Go and allowing you to lead me... single or plural, my heart is open to your will for me.
 
I would encourage you to continue playing the long game, with self improvement being at the top of the list. Hopefully the family that Yah would have for you is also on that journey and your paths will converge when you are both ready.

Clarification to all: self improvement would start with ones relationship with the Almighty.
 
It's not as easy as it would seem for a single woman to find a family to join. I know what I want in my heart of hearts and that is to have children in a Godly home, with a righteous man, leading a strong pack of momma wolves, who are just as dedicated to building a relationship with God and raising children who understand that we are the stewards of this precious life and everything in it. Being interconnected to this husband and wives feels so important to me at times... (is it an obsession?)

The more I look for this life, the more I see that I'm not alone in the long search. How much easier it would be for me to just join a monogamous relationship... (it's just as hard to find) I've worked so much on self healing after a long abusive marriage and I feel that pushed me over the hump of self pity about not finding a family quickly enough... (what a crybaby I can be about it sometimes)

So I give it all to you God, I'm letting Go and allowing you to lead me... single or plural, my heart is open to your will for me.
Is your hubby still alive? If so, how can we pray for him?
 
Is your hubby still alive? If so, how can we pray for him?
I pray for my ex husband everyday that God gives him a second chance at marriage and that he graciously keeps his abusive behavior to himself, that he doesn't accidentally kill someone in a fit of rage and that he throws away his golf clubs or anything that makes him want to be physically violent towards women. I also pray for the next wife God allows him to be with and I thank God for making me a resilient person in life.
 
Does he know about Biblical Families?
 
It's not as easy as it would seem for a single woman to find a family to join.

I am sure it is not easy for single women. Or families. Or really anyone. I do not think it is a call to "easy". Like a lot of God's ways it is often a call to "hard".

I think as a Christian whether polygamous or not, we are all called to put our faith in God, to accept that he is our portion, that he is our reward, that his will be done, and for us to have the strength to accept and obey his will as best that we can determine it.

God bless you and may he grant the desires of your heart.
 
I am sure it is not easy for single women. Or families. Or really anyone. I do not think it is a call to "easy". Like a lot of God's ways it is often a call to "hard".

I think as a Christian whether polygamous or not, we are all called to put our faith in God, to accept that he is our portion, that he is our reward, that his will be done, and for us to have the strength to accept and obey his will as best that we can determine it.

God bless you and may he grant the desires of your heart.
I would like to second that. Unfortunately for you, God's Word clearly reveals that if a woman divorces her husband, she must either remain single or else be reconciled to him, and that if she is married to another man, while he is alive, she shall be called an adulteress. Jesus Himself said that whoever looks at a woman belonging to another, with desire to have her, is committing adultery with her in his heart, and He also said that whoever marries her that is divorced, commits adultery with her. In fact, he told the men that if they divorce their wives, except in the case where fornication takes place, they are causing her to commit adultery.

Your husband needs to have some godly men rebuke him. Prov 27:1 tells us that the one who stiffens his neck after being rebuked often enough, will suddenly be cut off. When we talk about Biblical Families, we know that there are men out there who are like Nabal, and they can find themselves married to a wonderful woman such as Abigail, even in a society where polygyny is acceptable, and we have to trust that God will rectify this situation one way or the other, as He did in her case.
 
It's not as easy as it would seem for a single woman to find a family to join. I know what I want in my heart of hearts and that is to have children in a Godly home, with a righteous man, leading a strong pack of momma wolves, who are just as dedicated to building a relationship with God and raising children who understand that we are the stewards of this precious life and everything in it. Being interconnected to this husband and wives feels so important to me at times... (is it an obsession?)

The more I look for this life, the more I see that I'm not alone in the long search. How much easier it would be for me to just join a monogamous relationship... (it's just as hard to find) I've worked so much on self healing after a long abusive marriage and I feel that pushed me over the hump of self pity about not finding a family quickly enough... (what a crybaby I can be about it sometimes)

So I give it all to you God, I'm letting Go and allowing you to lead me... single or plural, my heart is open to your will for me.
Dear one, my heart goes out to you. We were both at retreat as singles, but I never had the privilege of spending a few minutes connecting. You're a beautiful young woman and had I not read your posts on this thread, I would never had guessed you'd experience the violence and abuse to which you've alluded. Believe me, I read between the lines! You have headed! You can see this, and others as well because of how you moved amongst our group at retreat. Your body language does not portray abuse nor the pity-party. There's no doubt you are still healing so I encourage you to seek that path, yield to it though diving deeper into the pain and hurt of the past in order to achieve additional healing may well be painful itself. You've seen your God do so much for you already. Ask great things and expect great things! He hears your heart cry. He knows your heart's desires. Continue to draw nigh to the Lover of your soul--your Saviour as @steve also encouraged. You have to know that He is holding you, every minute of every day! So cry those tears and be willing to ride the waves of emotion which flood over you instead of stuffing or shutting down. Your tears are precious to our Father, so much so that He catches every one and bottles them! It's in these moments that more healing comes, new insights are often revealed, we hear that still small voice in our ears. You are not forgotten! I'm really kicking myself for not making a conscious effort to reach out to you at retreat. You are a precious daughter of the King. Be patient--I know it's hard. Walk this path, know the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord. He even places our feet on His, IF we'll yield. As you draw nigh, be open to what your Father brings into your path. Resist the temptation to second guess Him. Learn to TRUST even though it seems to make no sense to you at the moment. He sees what we can not see and knows what we do not know. Be willing to step out of the boat as Peter did in Matt. 14. When your Saviour says, "Come" be ready to walk that path. He's preparing you right now. Be diligent in that preparation. Psalm 37:4, 5 has a promise from our Father. There's also an "IF" clause. Schooch up close to the One who loves you more than anyone on earth ever could. He can bring you to the one on earth who will love you as your Father does. Dare to ask--it's the law of the Kingdom--you must ask. Jer. 33:3 Then believe against all odds as did Abraham in Romans 4:20, 21.

You're in OKC so we're close enough to connect. PM if you wish. I'd love to spend time with you. Blessings to you my sister!
 
Unfortunately for you, God's Word clearly reveals that if a woman divorces her husband, she must either remain single or else be reconciled to him, and that if she is married to another man, while he is alive, she shall be called an adulteress.

Hi, @Daniel DeLuca. Good to meet you at the retreat. I do think, though, that you would benefit from studying a little deeper on the divorce and adultery dynamic. It is only adultery if the woman treacherously divorced her husband. It does not sound like @Nicoleplusluv treacherously divorced her husband, which leaves her entirely free to marry again to a godly man and be free from being labeled an adulteress.
 
Hi, @Daniel DeLuca. Good to meet you at the retreat. I do think, though, that you would benefit from studying a little deeper on the divorce and adultery dynamic. It is only adultery if the woman treacherously divorced her husband. It does not sound like @Nicoleplusluv treacherously divorced her husband, which leaves her entirely free to marry again to a godly man and be free from being labeled an adulteress.
Amen to that @Keith Martin! I whole heartedly agree! There are threads on this forum that very thoroughly explore the Biblical truth surrounding this often hotly debated topic of divorce. @Verifyveritas76 has some well-thought-out explanations explaining how 1st century believers and the Biblical mandates which governed their lives on this very topic specifically protected girls, women, wives from predator patriarchs. It's another area in which our western culture and the church have really twisted this thing on it's head.

Again, I wish to encourage and love on you--@Nicoleplusluv. I'm so aware that you have been judged on the fact that you're divorced until you are blue in the face or feel like you could just scream. My heart ached for you as I read the typical response to your divorced status mentioned and responded to by @Keith Martin. I know it hurts and am sure it brings tears over and over. Our Father doesn't judge you! He loves you and is bringing you along as you heal. He has someone very special for you. Continue to TRUST and be patient--hard as I know it is. Our Father hasn't forgotten you. His timing is perfect. Keep a song in your heart and serve your Lord with gladness. One of these days you'll be blessed beyond your wildest dreams--beyond measure!
 
Amen to that @Keith Martin! I whole heartedly agree! There are threads on this forum that very thoroughly explore the Biblical truth surrounding this often hotly debated topic of divorce. @Verifyveritas76 has some well-thought-out explanations explaining how 1st century believers and the Biblical mandates which governed their lives on this very topic specifically protected girls, women, wives from predator patriarchs. It's another area in which our western culture and the church have really twisted this thing on it's head.

Again, I wish to encourage and love on you--@Nicoleplusluv. I'm so aware that you have been judged on the fact that you're divorced until you are blue in the face or feel like you could just scream. My heart ached for you as I read the typical response to your divorced status mentioned and responded to by @Keith Martin. I know it hurts and am sure it brings tears over and over. Our Father doesn't judge you! He loves you and is bringing you along as you heal. He has someone very special for you. Continue to TRUST and be patient--hard as I know it is. Our Father hasn't forgotten you. His timing is perfect. Keep a song in your heart and serve your Lord with gladness. One of these days you'll be blessed beyond your wildest dreams--beyond measure!
Yes! I was as confused as anyone regarding this issue for years. I realize that many of you are not of the "messianic" persuasion, but Steve Berkson of MTOI has one of the best and thorough teachings on divorce and remarriage. One key point is the difference between "putting away" and "divorce". It's on YouTube if anyone is interested.
 
Hi, @Daniel DeLuca. Good to meet you at the retreat. I do think, though, that you would benefit from studying a little deeper on the divorce and adultery dynamic. It is only adultery if the woman treacherously divorced her husband. It does not sound like @Nicoleplusluv treacherously divorced her husband, which leaves her entirely free to marry again to a godly man and be free from being labeled an adulteress.
Well I am certainly willing to explore that topic further. I certainly don't like being hard nosed on this, and I most certainly don't judge a woman who has left her husband, but I am also cautious of convoluted logic that attempts to explain away troublesome texts.
 
Well I am certainly willing to explore that topic further. I certainly don't like being hard nosed on this, and I most certainly don't judge a woman who has left her husband, but I am also cautious of convoluted logic that attempts to explain away troublesome texts.

I appreciate your response Daniel. I would also encourage you to study this deeper. Further study into the cultural norms of the day will definitely shed light on these troublesome texts and iron out the wrinkles.

With that being said, lets take any additional divorce conversations to another thread and give @Nicoleplusluv her thread back.

Thanks
 
I would like to second that. Unfortunately for you, God's Word clearly reveals that if a woman divorces her husband, she must either remain single or else be reconciled to him, and that if she is married to another man, while he is alive, she shall be called an adulteress.

I truly apologize for causing any fuss in the forum. We should only speak on things we know or have personally been through in life that is my belief.

I'm Nicole and I have been in an extremly violent marriage that could have resulted in my death. That relationship won't be reconciled by me, but will be avenged by God.

"Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord." Roman 12:19 (NIV)
 
I truly apologize for causing any fuss in the forum.
No need to apologize, Nicole. This nonsense has been brought up before, many times inappropriately, and debated back and forth. And sadly, it will continue to happen. I'm sorry it was brought up on your thread and applied publicly to your personal situation. :( Regardless of anyone's position, there's a time and place for that discussion, and this thread ain't it. ;)

Kudos to you for taking the high-road with your open and candid response! :)
 
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Nicole, you seem like a righteous woman who fears the Most High. My best "advice" would be to seek Yah with all of your heart, follow his commandments, love others, pursue righteousness, and he will give you the desires of your heart. There is a righteous man out there for you, we do exist. I think you will also find that as time moves on and we get closer and closer to the end times, the need for Yah fearing helpmeets is going to be very important. You seem to have a great heart and a willing spirit to follow his ways, so I pray for you sister that Yah brings the right family into your life.
 
it's a delicate subject... but life keeps on going and in that we should all find our strength.
And that is all anyone can do. Finding strength in God and continue to push through. No matter how good or bad life throws at you just give praise to Him. While I have not experienced the subject you've had gone through myself (and pray that I do not have to.) I have witness such things closely with those I care for the most. I will keep you up in prayers, like so many here I'm sure are also doing.

I do not doubt Ha'shem will bless you and keep you. That you will find a good and righteous man in your life that will love you, teach you, and adore you in all things. Just faithfully in Ha'shem and let not yourself because stressed or worry yourself out. I know that has not done me any good in my earlier young adult life. I know its hard, even I continue to question myself that every now and then. But I'm sure whoever Ha'shem sends to you will be the luckiest man in the world. Who will have a huge heart of gold to share that ideal dream with you. Until then, just continue to push on and never give up.
 
1 Corinthians 7:15-If the unbelieving depart, let them depart. Brother nor sister are bound in such cases.
I married a "once saved always saved" Christian Reformed. When she was baptized, she didn't repent of sin. She sees no significants of baptism, and rejects Biblical law, unless it was to judge me.
I finally had to let go, and deem her as an unbeliever.
The Gospel is simple, but too complicated to a carnal minded stubborn willed.
 
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