Tlaloc
Member
Who didn't? I agree with lightly but I proposed to my girlfreind three days after we started dating
I tend to think that our culture deliberates extremely too long concerning marriage. There isn't much more to ask other than is she\he\they known to be Godly and do you all naturally get along well. And naturally getting along well is optional. Common faith, common purpose, and commitment is all we really need. It may take time to discern the quality of a person, but as soon as that can be confidently ascertained then waiting is just waiting. Frankly I'm sick of the culture that puts off marriage until the mid 20's to 30's or even too the 40's, and puts off kids until even later. I want as little to do with its endless search for the perfect match and quite a lot of appreciating someone for whoever they are and who God made them.
I agree there is no reason to assume the transition will be difficult for its own sake. Full disclosure is certainly the best policy, and I'm happy you had a good report about it in that case.
1. I completely agree, and also find that reactions are not always as bad as would be expected.
2. I would say don't assume very much about the views of someone who calls themselves a Christian period. There are a wide variety of orthodox and heterodox views out there in the heads of a wide variety of people. No need to assume Christian means any more than 'someone who belies in Jesus for their salvation' sometimes it doesn't even mean that to the person that says it, but in general we can assume that common and important ground.
3. I generally agree, but discretion is the better part of valour. We have a mixed bag of people that know outright and people which we have never brought it up too. There are several cases where it seems better to me to plant ideas in their heads gradually and let them think it out rather than pushing my views directly.
4. Do what you like to do? Nice advice
5. Good idea.
6. I don't understand this one. I guess with us her friends are my friends and my friends are her friends in the first place, so there isn't really anywhere to expand this way.
7. Generally a good idea within its bounds.
8. Look in every way available too you, I agree there is no need to rely on or neglect any medium.
9. Many good churches have things they put on for the community at large. We met families from other churches via our VBS for example. Its good advice, but for those that take it I would recommend looking into that kind of gathering rather than just popping in on a random Sunday.
10. This may or may not conflict with being forthright. Either way I'm not sure why a Christian singles group is better than any other given Christian group, unless you're recommending this to find a second wife, in that case it seems like good advice.
11. Its a good idea, but its a longer term one that really needs a developed local poly community of at least a few families.
12. I have not thought of that, though I have though of posting some of the Biblical Families materials on open community bulletin boards. Newspaper ads are not a bad idea if they will take them.
13. I suppose tracts have their place, but I generally consider it a big step down from getting to know people 1:1 and working person by person. It might be a good idea to get together a printable 'Poly Tract' though, what do the site admins think of it?
14. We have the problem when we risk censorship, loss of jobs, or legal action. Discretion is the better part of valour here again.
"when the disclosure was appropriate" In that context its good advice though
15. LOL
16. Quite a few,myself included, do do a short testimonial in their introduction. Others do one latter. The more that do the better I say.
17. Yeah
Not a bad list, a lot of it is just promoting polygamy stuff, which is more important than finding a sister wife in any given case.
some men should not be trusted with a wife until they are older and settled down. to trust that a family will settle a young feller down is often a disastrous mistake.