Sorry in advance for this being a little too long, but please hear me out.
Luke 6:47 Whosoever cometh to me, and heareth my sayings, and doeth them, I will shew you to whom he is like:
Luke 6:48 He is like a man which built an house, and digged deep, and laid the foundation on a rock: and when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently upon that house, and could not shake it: for it was founded upon a rock.
Luke 6:49 But he that heareth, and doeth not, is like a man that without a foundation built an house upon the earth; against which the stream did beat vehemently, and immediately it fell; and the ruin of that house was great.
I had this discussion with a friend on mine the other day, and the topic of a good marriage came to up. I told him that a marriage without God, may not necessarily failed in man’s term’s, but will always failed in the eyes of the Lord. Life in general, and marriage in particular, is the hardest thing that we have to go through. It takes work from all parties to make it work, which is one reason God created a “help meet” for Adam. Without God in our lives, we are lost, period. The above scriptures do not say that life will be easy, on the contrary, the Lord uses a Flood and a storm to represent what the environment will do to each house build in each scenario. We all know God is referring to Life as that storm, and a good foundation, will help us weather whatever Life throws at us, that foundation being faith and belief in Christ our savior.
Mat 16:17 And Jesus answered and said unto him, Blessed art thou, Simon Barjona: for flesh and blood hath not revealed it unto thee, but my Father which is in heaven.
Mat 16:18 And I say also unto thee, That thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.
Mat 16:19 And I will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.
God doesn’t say that the storms, or life, will stop. He doesn’t say that we will be free from temptation or from falling from his grace, but if we put our trust, truly put ourselves in his hands, and have faith in him, we will survive and be saved. What does all this have to do with this post? The point is I believe it more important to build a good foundation in our children’s lives; one that is rooted in the truth, the real truth. One that has our children knowing that God loves them, that he sent his only son to die for them and all mankind for the sins that we all have committed. Getting the foundation right and grounded is more important in not only our own lives, but especially those of our children. That being said, I think if you have laid the proper foundation in God for our children, there would be no need for us to arrange a marriage for our children. God will dwell within them as he does us. He will guide their lives as he does ours. He will give them what they will need, and provide for them.
Mat 6:25 Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?
Mat 6:26 Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?
Mat 6:27 Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature?
Mat 6:28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin:
Mat 6:29 And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
Mat 6:30 Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?
Mat 6:31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?
Mat 6:32 (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek
for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.
Mat 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
Mat 6:34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
This being said, I feel that arranged marriages are barbaric, and takes away from Gods guidance over our lives and those of our children. I believe it would be more akin to force, not love, which is the way we all have to go about bringing back the truth about plural marriages. Forcing our will, mans will, onto our wives, will only bring heart ache and in the end failure, because we are in a way, taking our judgment over God’s, and God is never wrong. The mate that we pick out for our children, may not be the one that God had intended for them all along. This brings us to the other point of soul mates. I believe that the one we are destined for, the one or ones, that God has intended for us, are soul mates. So yes I do believe in soul mates. To give a personal example, when I met my wife she told me later, that she actually felt me come into the room, even before she saw me. Also when we talked that night and danced, she slid right into my arms and put her head into my chest as if it had been there all along. From moment one, I could tell that this woman was very special and unique for me. Everything just clicked. It was like we had known each other from the very beginning.
Which bring me the final point of this post, I love my wife very much. I can not imagine my life without her, if I were to lose her it would be akin to losing an arm or leg, or another part of myself. I am still the same, but not quite whole.
Eph 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
Eph 5:29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
Eph 5:30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
As well as…
John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
John 3:17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.
John 3:18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.
So yes, I also believe in Love being a key part to marriage as well. So in a nut shell, I think arranged marriages, takes away from what God intends, I believe that God has someone or someone’s prepared for all of us, making them soul mates, and most definitely LOVE. However, as I pointed out earlier, without the foundation of God in our lives, or marriages, it will be doomed to fail. It takes all and more to make a marriage work. As well as I pointed out previously, Life goes on, and storms come our way, we are fallible and imperfect, we will and our children will, make mistakes, this is just the nature of our existence. Having God as our foundation, will make us flourish and prosper.
Now as far as age goes, and this is purely a personal view point. I believe that a great age difference between men and women is bordering on the side of immorality. I say it like this, if the age difference is more than what it would be for this to be your child, I would not pursue it. It would be akin to having someone that could be your child. I know the bible has references to children, very young children, coming into bloom and coming of age at very young age, yet to me, I feel that a much older person say 60, tries to marry someone say 12 who has started her womanhood, is child molesting and is sick. Even say someone of 20 and 12. Now when the 12 reaches say 18 and the man is 26, this would be more easy to handle, for the maturity, both intellectual and emotional is developed more than at 12 and 20. Well I will get off my soap box now, sorry again for being so long.
Good night and God Bless.
Nicely said....and I do agree. No matter what, I put my trust in God to always guide me and my family to his will and blessings, even though I may not understand his wisdom behind them.